Go Home Fear, You’re Drunk

Excitement has side effects if not properly harnessed; it can turn into nerves which then morph into fear. Have you ever noticed yourself or others laughing too much, blushing and flushing, left speechless or frozen when overly excited or nervous? It’s an uncomfortable and embarrassing by-product of the emotions, thoughts, hormones and chemicals going on the body when someone is subject to elation, thrill, or frenzy. Me? I talk too fast and blush too much.

Maybe you can relate to something like performing or speaking in front of others for the first time, or competing in a tournament. You want the experience, you have been preparing for it, you are getting really excited….more excited now….into full blown, “Holy spit, I CAN’T do this,” mode!!

Aaaaaaaaand, in sweeps F E A R.
False Evidence Appearing Real

When we want something, we get excited right? Then that excitement turns into fear and all our excuses and negative feelings start coming up.

We humans are bent on making stories up in our heads, overreacting to things, making amazing assumptions, and convincing ourselves of straight up lies. The lies that we can’t, that we aren’t good enough, smart enough, fast enough. Maybe we don’t even know the lies, it’s just an obscured belief from childhood that keeps playing out subconsciously in our lives that we aren’t this, or can’t do that.

Ok, with that said, I will say that we must appreciate fear. It’s feeling a little picked on at the moment so let us give fear its due appreciation and credit for being a helpful experience on this Earthly life. Fear exists to keep us safe on a primal level; to warn us of impending attack or harm. It boosts adrenaline and creates superhero like power in some cases. Fear is an amazing tool that can be used to keep us alert and educated to be safe in any endeavor, and to let us know when our lives are truly in danger.

Fear gives birth to shame, worthlessness, anger, and more. Fear hides behind these other feelings as well. These are very sneaky feelings. Because they are disguised in some form of fear (they were born from fear, remember) and because fear is often disguised as these other feelings, they get us thinking that we are going to be harmed by that person, or this experience; we think that these other feelings disguised as fear are keeping us safe. It tells us not to do something so we don’t risk making a mistake and a fool of ourselves. It makes us feel safe by justifying our lack of attendance in life experiences that make us overly nervous and shut down, so we avoid things and people altogether. Fear keeps us from having that relationship we so deeply ache for, that we won’t risk even one ounce of our hearts for, because we are afraid of pain.

Life is not meant to be lived stagnantly. Change is happening around us whether we choose to be aware of it or not. It sweeps us up and begs for us to grow within its experience. Are you in? Or are you complacent with letting change make you its plaything?

In or Out, 
It’s Your Choice

If we are in – INtentional. INterested, INformed, INtelligent, and INspired, then we can be badass at anything we want to be badass at! The most badass people that have ever lived, in any timeline, in any culture, in any part of the word, have surely made mistakes and looked a fool while they practiced their badassery. Did they experience fear? Sure thing. But they held onto the excitement of their goals consistently.

When we allow fear to control us, things that make us nervous keep us from showing up fully in our lives and for others. We miss out on beautiful experiences, business contacts, learning opportunities, serving others, and expanding our awareness. The Universe has fewer opportunities to bring us what we truly want and need. Then we get to play victim by feeling shut down, thinking and declaring to the world that life has nothing but crap to give us. Here is a phrase we all must remember.

It is a choice.

How Much Do We Want What We Want?

Aside from brainstorming and daydreaming, I believe that at a great level, we do really want something when we say we want it. But when it’s a big, bad, scary, FEAR based thing that we want….that healthy romantic relationship, the job we have a passion for, that move to another city, to have a fit body, to quit smoking….we sabotage ourselves. We might want it but we don’t want it quite enough to make it happen; that takes 100% commitment and usually involves making significant lifestyle changes and doing deep personal work. Sometimes we never do what we need to do to accomplish our goals and dreams. Sometimes we are addicted to the same old trauma, drama, and illness.

Sometimes though, the process takes time. Years even. Our desire grows until it is strong enough to get to that critical moment when we actually take the steps needed to create what we want. Processing through fears, conditioning, and beliefs can take a long time. Quiet contemplation allows us to get to know the self well enough to recognize if we are growing and evolving slowly, or simply stuck in a pattern.

To have any change, or to have things we want, we have to want it bad enough that it permeates every. fiber. of. our. being! We must want it to a level that gives us strength, hope, and courage, even during our darkest times. The light of our power, the intentions in the heart, and the actions we take shine into our lives to keep us motivated and happy. We are working towards what we want; not every stepping stone is the destination, nor every situation permanent.

Sometimes the journey is the bigger achievement than actually reaching the goal.

So, ask yourselves what you really want, if you are willing to do what it takes to get it, and recognize when your fear is keeping you from living fully and authentically. Take your fear and convert it back to excitement for your life!